From TODAY, Voices
Wednesday December 24, 2008
Kids grow up disrespectful and spoilt when parents fail to discipline them
Ho Kong Loon
BULLYING in schools is one of the manifestations of the lack of firm discipline, which starts with liberal parents who insist on handling their kids gingerly with a huge dose of over-protectiveness and indulgence.
Schools, under immense pressure from vocal and demanding parents, cave in to their insistence that only the parents have the right and responsibility to discipline their kids. Many teachers adopt a hands-off policy just to avoid unnecessary hassle of having to explain their actions to parents of kids who have been “wronged” by being disciplined.
Uncomplimentary terms like lazy, naughty, playful and uncooperative are frowned upon. Euphemisms thrive, and many remain puzzled why kids of today still hand in written work late or not at all, or why rowdy kids disrupt lessons with impunity.
School discipline has been degenerating for many years, and like the ostrich which buries its head in the sand, some can’t comprehend why kids eventually turn out to be vociferous, self-centred and disrespectful of rules and elders.
It is time all parents grab the issue by the scruff of the neck and say “enough is enough!” Parenting is about setting the kids on the straight and narrow path from the word “go”.
There should be no compromise where firm discipline is concerned. Orderliness, respect for others, rules of ethics and civics, good citizenship and other such values, once ingrained in the mindset, enable the individual to navigate their way through their teenage years and adulthood without the major upheavals associated with rebelliousness, callousness, truculence or defiance.
Parents must work hand in glove with teachers to help mould the child’s character during his or her formative years. It is imperative that adults bite the bullet and institute a sea change now, or they will find themselves biting their nails in frustration and angst in later years should correction, counselling or punitive measures be needed in adulthood.
Yes, I am suggesting parents and teachers reclaim their rights and responsibility to ensure the young ones grow up polite, responsible, thoughtful and respectful of rules and laws meant for the good and comfort of all.
There is nothing so pathetic or comical as adults who cave in to the kids’ demands regardless of the legitimacy or correctness. Let us nip juvenile indiscipline in the bud and consign it to the debris of misplaced liberalism and individualism.
The writer is a teacher.
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Santa and Jesus
Santa lives at the North Pole. Jesus is everywhere.
Santa rides in a sleigh. Jesus rides on the wind and walks on the water.
Santa comes but once a year. Jesus is an everpresent help.
Santa fills your stockings with goodies. Jesus supplies all your needs.
Santa comes down your chimney uninvited. Jesus stands at your door and knocks and then enters your heart.
You have to stand in line to see Santa. Jesus is as close as the mention of His Name.
Santa lets you sit on his lap. Jesus lets you rest in His arms.
Santa doesn't know your name, all he can say is, "Hi little boy or girl, what's your name?"
Jesus knew our name before we did. Not only does He know our name, He knows our address, too. He knows our history and future and He even knows how many hairs are on our head.
Santa has a belly like a bowlful of jelly. Jesus has a heart full of love.
All Santa can offer is "Ho, ho, ho!" Jesus offers health, help and hope.
Santa says, "You better not cry." Jesus says, "Cast all your cares on me for I care for you."
Santa's little helpers makes toys. Jesus makes new life, mends wounded hearts, repairs broken homes and builds mansions.
Santa may make you chuckle, but Jesus gives you joy that is your strength.
While Santa puts gifts under the tree, Jesus became our gift and died on the tree.
It's obvious there really is no comparison. We need to remember WHO Christmas is all about. We need to put Christ back in Christmas. Jesus is still the reason for the season.
May the Lord bless and watch over you and your loved ones this Christmas. And may He prosper and bless the work of your hands in the New Year ahead.
From TODAY, Voices
Friday December 12, 2008
Many of us stay in our comfort zones without realising it
Letter from Jimmy Ho Kwok Hoong
I REFER to “Don’t wait, just do it” (Dec 10), which described how a group of Singaporeans took five minutes to offer an umbrella to someone in the rain.
Even though I am not a psychologist, allow me to forward my views for this.
Most Singaporeans are brought up in a spoonfed environment. Through time, they lose the conviction to act in a “grey” situation or one that requires decisiveness.
While what is often necessary in life is to take risks in a calculated manner, many stay within their comfort zones without noticing it themselves.
Two decades ago, Singapore started to go global in a big way. During that time, when an opportunity arose, the Taiwanese and the Hong Kongers could be seen running towards it. Singaporeans, on the other hand, would side-step to assess the risk and reward ratios, or strengths and weaknesses before moving ahead.
Many of us have also invested in China thinking that the Chinese would change their business system to ours, and without accommodating for their public mindsets.
We have tried developing initiatives but the internal systems continue to be auto-penalising to those thinking out of the box, whether in education or within the business circle. We took too long to accept the negative psychological effects of our primary school streaming system.
Likewise, creativity is being compromised in business practices, sometimes by those in control to secure their own positions.
In my view, our traditional system of conservatism only serves well in circumstances such as our tripartite union action, involving the workers, the employer and the Government during bad times, where the majority look forward to top-down instructions.
In the case of Mr Tan Kin Lian who was speaking in the rain, I would guess that, initially, everyone was waiting for others to offer him the umbrella first, in order not to be seen as directly being associated with him.
They failed to calculate the risk involved and in the process, lost the opportunity to be — simply — a considerate human being.
From TODAY, Voices
Thursday December 11, 2008
We parents must help our children make sense of the mindless violence they see on the news daily
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Subana Hall
MY seven-year-old and I often have conversations about world affairs and as most children do, my child too tries to put the world right. Although I am often intrigued by her interpretation of war and order in the world, I was most moved by the comments she made this weekend when we discussed the Mumbai bombings.
The discussion arose when she saw me reading a Weekend Xtra piece, “The Winner is ... Iran” (Dec 6). Leaning over from the back seat of the car she asked, “Mummy, who is Iran? Is that him?”, pointing to a picture of an analyst on the page.
I explained to her that Iran was a country and briefly described what the article was about. As my seven-year-old has been watching the news of the recent Mumbai attacks, she sat up and asked more questions about the article and wanted to know more.
She asked me in all innocence: “Why did those people kill the others? It is not nice to kill others, is it mummy?” If only everyone had the simple wisdom of a seven-year-old, I thought to myself.
As most parents would, I explained to my inquisitive daughter that sadly, in the real world, not everyone is as wise as her and that the world would certainly be a better place if only every person had nice thoughts like her.
She still did not understand why or how people could commit such violence... but then again, neither do I.
She then asked if there was a place on earth that had not been bombed before, to which I replied I am sure there is and that we needed to do some research on that. As our conversation, although meaningful, was getting a little factual and deep, I was almost ready to wrap it up when she suddenly blurted out: “Will Singapore ever be bombed, Mummy? I hope not.” To which I replied: “Me too, sweetheart”.
At this point I felt real sadness in my heart that my child has such fear and I cannot begin to describe how protective I felt over her.
After a short pause, she concluded our chat with this statement: “I wish we could move to a planet where there will be no bombing, Mummy”. With that, she looked out of the window and stared at the petrol station.
I looked at her and thought: What powerful words from a seven-year-old. She was clearly thinking deeply about what had happened and empathised with those killed unfairly.
I was moved by her empathy at such a young age.
On one hand, I was sad that she was growing up witnessing such horrific events; on the other hand, I was proud that she was one of the rays of hope of our future generation.
So let us — the present generation of parents from all around the world — do our part in instilling a sense of unity and right and wrong in our children for a better and more peaceful world tomorrow. Vigilance alone will not be enough. We have to continue to sow seeds of love, tolerance and empathy.
We can’t give up hope yet.
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The writer is a former Television Corporation of Singapore journalist who was born here, but moved to England. She has since moved back to Singapore.
From TODAY, World
Wednesday December 10, 2008
RAMAT HASHARON (Israel) — An electric transport company is to install thousands of recharging points for electric cars across Israel ready for commercial use by 2011 in the first such nationwide network.
The firm, Better Place, demonstrated its first charging spot on Monday at a car park above a shopping centre in Ramat Hasharon, near Tel Aviv. In a pilot project, it will install 500 of the charging points by the end of this year in several cities, including Tel Aviv, Haifa and Jerusalem. It expects to have 500,000 charging points by the time the first cars are marketed.
Mr Moshe Kaplinsky, head of Better Place Israel, said the firm believed it presented a fundamental challenge to petrol-driven cars. “This vision is to stop this addiction to oil,” he said.
“The profits of oil, we know where they go,” he told a news conference.
“Unfortunately a great part of the resources of oil are held by countries that don’t share the same values we cherish in the western civilisation where we live. The gap is very clear between the price of producing a barrel of oil and the price that it sells for on the world market. And in some places these profits finance terror.”
Better Place expects a lithium-ion car battery to last for 106 miles (170.6 kilometres). Given Israel’s small size, the company expects relatively little need for changing batteries.
Payment for the service would come through a monthly account, similar to a mobile telephone bill. No prices have been announced, but Mr Kaplinsky said the cost of buying the car and paying for recharging would be less than the costs incurred with petrol-driven cars. “We intend that by 2020 almost all the cars in Israel will be electric vehicles,” he said.
Better Place, which is based in California, has signed deals for similar electric car networks in San Francisco, Denmark and Australia but the project in Israel is seen as its pioneer system. The firm has signed agreements with the Israeli government and with Renault-Nissan, who will supply the electric cars.
Separately, Better Place announced yesterday it will build battery exchange stations in Japan as part of a government pilot project to encourage the use of green cars. The Guardian