When I Was Young

From TODAY, Voices

Wednesday December 24, 2008

Kids grow up disrespectful and spoilt when parents fail to discipline them

Ho Kong Loon

BULLYING in schools is one of the manifestations of the lack of firm discipline, which starts with liberal parents who insist on handling their kids gingerly with a huge dose of over-protectiveness and indulgence.

Schools, under immense pressure from vocal and demanding parents, cave in to their insistence that only the parents have the right and responsibility to discipline their kids. Many teachers adopt a hands-off policy just to avoid unnecessary hassle of having to explain their actions to parents of kids who have been “wronged” by being disciplined.

Uncomplimentary terms like lazy, naughty, playful and uncooperative are frowned upon. Euphemisms thrive, and many remain puzzled why kids of today still hand in written work late or not at all, or why rowdy kids disrupt lessons with impunity.

School discipline has been degenerating for many years, and like the ostrich which buries its head in the sand, some can’t comprehend why kids eventually turn out to be vociferous, self-centred and disrespectful of rules and elders.

It is time all parents grab the issue by the scruff of the neck and say “enough is enough!” Parenting is about setting the kids on the straight and narrow path from the word “go”.

There should be no compromise where firm discipline is concerned. Orderliness, respect for others, rules of ethics and civics, good citizenship and other such values, once ingrained in the mindset, enable the individual to navigate their way through their teenage years and adulthood without the major upheavals associated with rebelliousness, callousness, truculence or defiance.

Parents must work hand in glove with teachers to help mould the child’s character during his or her formative years. It is imperative that adults bite the bullet and institute a sea change now, or they will find themselves biting their nails in frustration and angst in later years should correction, counselling or punitive measures be needed in adulthood.

Yes, I am suggesting parents and teachers reclaim their rights and responsibility to ensure the young ones grow up polite, responsible, thoughtful and respectful of rules and laws meant for the good and comfort of all.

There is nothing so pathetic or comical as adults who cave in to the kids’ demands regardless of the legitimacy or correctness. Let us nip juvenile indiscipline in the bud and consign it to the debris of misplaced liberalism and individualism.

The writer is a teacher.

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